Rubbing a cat the wrong way

Past Deeds: Don't rub them in.

"I remember that day you were so mad... oh why was it again... oh yeah! So-and-so tried to trick you into doing..."

We all have done this, or have had it done to us. Yet, we stand there and let it happen. Well, here I go, putting in my 2 cents: Stop! I have never liked it when someone brings up a past situation when they know I am uncomfortable talking about it. Nevertheless, it happens time and time again, but why do they do it?

1. They are jealous.
I know this sounds childish but it's how it is. Perhaps the situation is not one that they've had and to them it sounds intriguing. They have no idea what it really does to you, and frankly they don't care to know, they just think being able to say it would be fun. Or, they are jealous of who you are now and want to put you down. So why not bring up past events to see you hurt or to put you down. If they can point out your faults then you are not "as good", they have somehow managed to lower you in their eyes. Such as in the movie "The Count of Monte Cristo" Fernand states that since Dantes is a clerk’s father (lower than his position) he should not want to be him. Perhaps the person wants to be like you and to counteract this desire they bring up every fault they can find.

2. They want to be empathetic.
This sounds so strange. I've seen myself do it though. Someone tells me of something they are going through and I have sympathy for them but no empathy, and I feel bad. I feel as though it is my job to coach them through this and it's easier when you understand what they are going through because you have gone through it. Yet, in this situation the person has not been through what you have, and they try and compensate this desire to be 100% understanding by bringing it up time and time again, thinking that if they do it enough they can have a thorough understanding, at least enough so that they can have empathy.